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Well hello there, Subscriber First Name! Here we are, mid-August. How are you all feeling, this time of the year? When I was a kid, I didn’t much care for the extremes of the school year- the joy at the start of a vacation and the disappointment at its end, those emotional highs and the lows, repeated throughout the year. For me, the continuous adjusting to a new phase felt harder than knowing exactly what I was supposed to be doing day in and day out. I am more of a creature of habit, as they say. And so when I hear my teenagers groan about heading back to school, I get it. It’s hard to get back into the swing of things. With all this, I’ve been thinking a lot about routines and schedules. Nature, the changing of the seasons, invites us to go with the flow, to ease from one phase to the next. Nothing is permanent, and nature reminds us of the need to recalibrate back into balance. We need structure and routine, but not too much, and not all the time. Days of ease are lovely, yet over time our intuition speaks up, and we acknowledge feeling ready to return to a schedule. But we live in a world where we can’t completely follow nature (as lovely as that would be). We are at the mercy of society, which gives us stricter instructions. Society dictates that we show up at 9 am, despite our need for rest. Maybe you have a life where you always need to be connected to work, or, perhaps being disconnected from work causes so much anxiety that taking a vacation doesn’t feel restorative. Stillness can feel scary and de-stabilizing, after all. Maybe your kids getting back to school is your own adult version of vacation, which feels sobering to type out, but is still true! Wherever you are in this spectrum- feeling ready for summer to fade into fall, or wishing summer could continue on- I do think we can all meet ourselves in a way that is supportive. I find that sometimes we resist how we are feeling, telling ourselves that we “shouldn’t” feel a certain way- and that in itself creates an additional stress loop. “Why am I like this? Why do I feel this way?” is such harsh messaging. “Why am I so tired? Why don’t I enjoy parenting the way that others seem to? Why does this feel so hard?” We can pick up on how critical this sounds when we hear it come from others, yet so often it’s how we talk to ourselves (on a daily basis!). What if we spoke to ourselves like this instead? “I DO feel this [x,y,z] way, and I wonder what I need right now?” This offers a softening, and opens the door to some self-compassion. It’s an invitation to care for ourselves. As a health and well-being coach, I work with people who are focused on different aspects of their health- maybe it’s increasing their intake of fruits and vegetables, becoming more physically active, strengthening their social networks, or developing tools for stress management. The way we talk to ourselves as we navigate these changes, big or small, matters greatly. Maybe one small step you can take today is to treat yourself more kindly. It’s worth a try. xx
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